I never wear pink. Except for my “I Stand with Planned Parenthood” tee shirt. And the tee shirt one of my sisters had made up with photos printed on it of all six of us as little girls. I must be about seven in that photo, and my bangs are crooked because my mother had cut them. The tee shirt is too big, but I wear it to yoga class sometimes.
Oh, and there’s the tee shirt that L.L. Bean called “faded red,” but that my husband calls pink, commenting every time I wear it that, “You don’t usually wear pink.” And over several years of washing it’s gotten more and more faded, so even I can no longer deny that it’s pink. But last time I folded it out of the dryer, I noticed that the neckline is starting to fray, so I can go back to never wearing pink, except when I do.
I never send greeting cards with verses inside. That one’s an absolute. Never.
I never watch horror movies. Except when I went to see this Italian movie at MoMA thinking it was a murder mystery. It turned out to be an Italian horror movie, very gory. Several people walked out, but the lead actor was actually English, and he pronounced his Italian very slowly and clearly, so that I could understand him without the subtitles, so I stayed. But I did close my eyes or look away several times because I never watch horror movies. Except when I do.
I never eat sea urchin, because I’ve tried it twice, once raw in a Japanese restaurant and once cooked in an Italian restaurant, and I didn’t like it either way. Twice in a lifetime was enough. Never again.
I never look up old boyfriends on the internet. But then I never look up any old friends on the internet.
I never make fun of other peoples’ hair styles, religious beliefs, or families. At least not out loud. Well, not in their hearing anyway.
I never treat my adult children as if they were still little kids. And they’re never correct when they think I still do.
And I would never state definitively that there are things I would never do, because you just never know. Except for never sending cards with verses inside. That one’s an absolute. Never.